Hidden Feelings
by Vedia Lovett
Summary: It's Shakespeare tragedy between Draco and Vedia.
1. Chapter 1

As I pack my bags my sister shouted from down the hall, asking if I had her blue sweater. I told her no; even though it's my favorite color, it didn't fit. I walked to the hall to find her picking it off her bedroom floor. I rushed down the steps to stuff my face with toast. As I brushed by my mom she scolded me to slow down, and chew before I choke on it. Then I burst through the front door while struggling to carry my luggage. Tripping on my way out I set some of the bags down. I tried fixing them in a way were i could carry them all at once. After a while my taxi arrived. He pulled up fast and stepped put even faster. Without turning the car off he asked my name and I confirmed it. The driver began to help me place my entire luggage in the trunk. After we slammed the trunk door closed and I quickly rushed to the back seat. When I clicked my seat belt, I look at the window to see my mom and dad waiting. I smile and wave, and I place my on the leather seat in front of me.

"To the train station please." I said to the driver. On the way to the train station, I see memories passed me by. The friends I had made while being here, and all the fun things we did. I quickly look ahead to close my eyes, and clear my thoughts. Thinking of Hogwarts made me nervous and extremely excited at the same time. I could only imagine what adventures I would have.

The driver turns around and asks for his money. I rushed through my purse and gave what was owed. Getting out of the car he helped me unload, then drove away. I then proceeded to walk about the train station. Looking around it took a while to find platform nine. When I found it I looked about where the third wall was located. After locating it I glanced around to make sure that no one was looking. When the coast was clear, I rushed into the wall. Closing my eyes, and adrenaline rushing I was almost positive that it wouldn't work. Expecting to crash at any point. After stepping a few more steps, then I realize I made it. I glanced up with one eye open to find a beautiful red train. Slowly walking up to the entrance door, I was marveling at the size of the train. It looked like it was brand new. Finally making it to the door the bellhop insisted on taking my luggage to another part of the train. I nodded and smiled, and rushed onto the train. It was crowded in the majority part of the train. Walking down the tiny halls I had to squeeze by students. Following a map, I carefully watched for the Slytheren cart. After finding the room with my luggage, I realized other people's luggage was in there too. Scoping out the room and the other luggage I opened my bag and pulled out my uniform. As a turned around to walk out the door, there was a guy leaning in the doorway. He had white hair with pale green eyes. He stood with a way about him that seemed harmless, yet showing that he could do such if needed.

"Will you please move?" I asked as if I was two and he was going to move on command.

"Why? You are in my way", he said.

So, I stepped as closely to the seats behind me and leaned back to make a pathway. Then I raised my right hand to show it was cleared. I smiled at him, but only to get daggers stared back. He then proceeded to walk past me, and sit at the nearest seat to the window. I shook my head and continued to walk to the bathroom. The train over the tracks would make the carts bump every now and then. It was hard to get dressed if you can't keep your balance. By the time I got my uniform on, we had arrived in school. I rushed to my cart to find two other boys and one brunette girl. I smiled and said," Hey, I'm Vedia. Vedia Lovett." But no one bothered to smile, or say who they were. So I just sat at the closest available seat to the door.

After a while the train stopped and we were instructed where to go. I just simply followed the other students from my cart. They led me to a bigger group of students wearing the same uniforms. We all walked to a dungeon like room. It was gray with blue-green pieces of cloth hanging from the ceiling. There were some couches of the same color in the center of the room, and then there were two sets of stair just like the brochure had a picture of. I then proceeded to go to the girls dorm and put away all my clothes. The other girls they looked at me then one another and started to talk. They went through a few subjects till they came to the topic of boys. wasn't concerned with their meaningless chatter so I left after I finished packing. I started to head to the door leading to the common room. Then I was only able to take a few steps when a girl with silky blond hair and brown eyes stopped me with a question.

"Which do you like more, Vedia?" she asked with a scummy like smile.

"I don't know anyone yet so I really couldn't say." I said with complete confidence.

"Oh ya that's right you're the new girl! Well you must have seen someone you like today. So come on tell us." Other girls repeated the same thing thinking that I didn't hear it the first time.

"No, no one. Though if I did he'd possible have already been on your list." I said with a smile that showed I wasn't playing around this year with girls like her. I then walked away, with the only sound of "ohhhs" following me from the room. From there I walked to the common room to find the white headed guy and his other two friends sitting there on the couches. So I figured I'd walk around to get to know the place. But before I got the door I was called for from the couches, knowing who it was I continued walking. The voice sounded really hostle when I placed my hand on the door.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!" he said.

I turned to find the white headed boy standing up from his seat with a look of impatience.

"What." I said with true concern.

"Don't talk to him like that!" one of the boys said while standing up.

"No," The white headed boy said while raising his hand as to tell him to sit, "It's ok, so, you're new?" He said as if he already knew but was trying to pick at me.

He started to walk closer to me slowly to try and show that he was the better one in this position. "If you're new don't you need someone to show you are around new girl?"I folded my arm and said, "Not if it's you."

He sped up his pace to a slow jog and got close and said," You watch your mouth you have no idea who you're talking to." Then he smiled. "Goyle, show our new ... friend ... the school."

"With pleasure Draco." Goyle said with sarcasm.

"Na... I think I got it" I said in a loud whisper.

As I started to walk away I could feel the anger emanating from the room behind me. I started to walk down the moving stair cases to the main halls. There you can see were that have portraits of past teachers and of school events. I touch every wall just to see the texture of the stone that was holding all the secrets of this place together. Each little window had a different stain image on it, some with knights and others of famous winnings of wizard cups. As I continued down the hall I didn't realize were I was going till I found myself in the court yard pacing around a tree that had such a way about it. Pink was the color of it radiating off of every flower pedal. I walk on a little further till I could see a bridge; I walk on it with care. To insure that I don't fall, I let my hand guild me the whole way across. Then I stumbled upon a lake that looked as if it were mucky, like it was thick or just really deep. I look down into the water to see what I could see. The only thing was a steal image of me. So I looked up to see how far it goes. It stretched till your eyes can't see it anymore. So with that note I walk back to the school. By the time I get back to the bridge. I'm already looking at the ground, so I'm surprised to see a pair of shoes in front of me. I look up and it's the Draco guy, with not a single expression on his face. I start to walk around him to avoid any conversation, but he had to say something.

"So?" he said as if he had something smart to say with it. I turn just to look at him with a plan face. "I'm guessing you're done with walking around?" Then he starts to walk away as if he was done. So I do the same.

"You know, you really must not know Me." he says while holding his finger in the air and shaking it. "Cause you haven't flinched or even batted an eye since you've showed up. Much less seeing me."

"We'll just say that I know your type." Then I start to walk away.

"Oh ya and what is that? Hum? I don't think you know at all!"  
I turn to look at him.

"It's the type of person who takes control to a level that they can't handle! You don't even know who I am so why are you concerning yourself with someone like me? Someone you don't know." I then walk away.

"You don't know me! You have no idea what I'm capable of!" he shouts to get the last words. As I walk away I hear him huffing and murmuring to himself.

Getting back at school I start to find my classes and were they all are. My first is Potion, then then Dark Arts next is Spells and finally it's Magical Creatures. Then I find the rooms and meet the teachers. After I meet the teachers I ask which students will be attending. Most of them didn't know until the roll came in; others didn't want to say so. So I just went about, back to the dorm to get a good night sleep. On my way back to the dorms I find myself being called from the end of the common room.

"Hey new girl, so you've been around the school? I heard that Draco really had a mouth full to say to you." The blond said with laughter. As if it were her concern or somehow made her better. So I shook my head and continued to my dorm. I change into my pajamas. When I finished some girls walk in to do the same. After I brush my hair and teeth the blond girl has more to say.

"You didn't say anything when I told you what I heard. Why? Is it true?" she said as if she was talking down to a baby. So I look at her to show her that I wasn't interested in playing her game. "Oh come on Vedia, it's not like I would tell anyone." she said with udder sarcasm. I rolled my eyes, followed by an exhale. Then it was just a competition to who could hold the start longer.

"Yes I talked to him." I said hoping that that was all she would want at the least. No, it only made her want more. She then went on rambling about all the possible things he could have said. None of which affected me, until she started to accuse me and my family of being mud bloods. This sparked something in me that I didn't realize was there. Something about it rubbed me the wrong way.

"Huh, it that it?" she said while hovering in my breathing space. The only thing I could do was look at the floor. But after a few more moments of interrogating, I snapped. I reached forward with my fist in hand and knocked her a good one. She fell to the floor with a loud thud. I was almost certain that the boy's dorm would hear. Then half of the room rushed over to see the damage and to help her up. Not wanting to hurt the situation even more I stepped over the girl and walked to the door, after I took a few steps outside the door I rushed down the steps and to the door out of the common room. But when I opened the door there standing was Draco. He looked at me with brief shock, and then he looked me up and down with confusion. He said nothing to me, so I pushed my way through. I then followed out to find the nearest teacher, but no one was to be found. So I sat in the hall were the only light was the moon. I stayed there thinking to myself. 'Why? Why did you do that? I mean... Huh ... I didn't have to hit her...' This conversation raced through my head. Till someone came walking down the hall. To my surprise it was Professor Snape.

"What. Are you doing out so late? Shouldn't you be in bed?" he said with such calmness.

"Sorry Professor, I need to tell you something. I hit a girl and she is really hurt. I didn't know what to do?" I tried to explain without getting upset.

"Rebecka? She is already at the nurse. Don't worry about her you just head along to bed now." he then started to walk away. "Tomorrow is a big day the first of school. Don't be late" he said while facing the direction he was walking. I just shook my head and walked back to my dorm. By the time I go to the moving stair cases, I bummed into someone.

"Sorry, I wasn't ..." When I looked up it was Draco. So I started to walk away.

"Watch wear you're going!" He said with hatred.

"I said I was sorry. Besides what are you doing out so late anyway?" I replied.

"Nothing that concerns you, besides I could ask you the same thing."

"I hit Rebecka. "I said as if I were proud. "Your turn."

"I don't have to tell you anything. "He said with such defense . He then started to walk away and so did I till I heard him turn and say. "Wait. You hit Rebecka?" He exclaimed liked he was impressed.

"Ya, ok now you can laugh at me. Go on."

"No that's... pretty cool she needed to be hit. It will take her down a few notches." He said while looking the other way. Then, when we looked at each other, we looked anywhere but each other's faces. "So, Can I walk you back to the dorms? Seeing as your a new student and all." He asked as if the question hurt. So I didn't want him to hurt himself.

"Na, I got it from here." I said. Then I walked up the first couple of steps. When I got to the top I heard he was just starting to step, I smiled. Then i walked the rest of the way back to the dorms alone.


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up the next morning, to the sounds of hairspray and 'that looks so good on you'. So I got up, brushed my teeth, fixed my hair and started a fresh day. That was the least to say for Rebecka; no matter how much makeup she put on she just couldn't cover her bruise. So to avoid the conversation of 'why did you do that', I walked faster than normal to get out of the dorm. When I entered the common room there was a crowd of people leaving. So I sat on the couch waiting for them to thin out. While I was waiting a girl approached me, she asked me why I hit Rebecka. I told her that I did it because I felt that I needed to. So she looked at me then the floor, like she believed me but she didn't want anyone else to know. After a while she walked away and left for breakfast. I started to read a book that was left on the table between the couches. I got lost in the book, when I looked up I was all alone. Then I rushed to put the book down were I found it and hurried to the dining hall. When I got to the door to leave the common room there was someone opening the door. They were talking to someone else, but it was more of a scolding. So I stood there waiting for them to open the door. When it opened it was Rebecka and one of her friends. She saw me and looked me up and down and said that I better stay away from Draco that he is hers. I looked at her with a smile that made her flinch.

"Don't worry I'm not interested", and I then walked away. I started to head down the steps for breakfast, but by the time I got there it was time for class. So I then proceeded to walk to Potions, my first class.

"Good morning everyone." Professor Snape said in his deep voice. "Did everyone bring their books?" I could hear him say from the hall.  
Everyone started to poor in, and sit in their sits and pairing themselves. They sit at tables of two, but when everyone sat down there are three tables left empty. So I took the closest one to the back. After a few minutes of class he explains what we will be learning this year. I start to fade out of the lesson, when all of a sudden someone sits beside me; they hit the desk hard which broke me from my sleepy state. He is breathing heavily as if he were running. It was Draco. He had his book opened and franticly looking for a page.

"What page." He whispered as softly as he could. "What page!" I froze not believing that he was there.

"Um … page 25." I said. He was still having trouble finding it so I took the book and moved mine over so I could better find the page. By the time I did that Professor Snape walked over and slammed his hand on the desk asking Draco what page we are on. He stumbled on his words then I said, "He knows." Then he interrupts with saying that he heard someone come in late. "It was me." I could feel Draco look at me. "I can in late, see I don't even have to the book opened to the page." He looks at me with confusion. Then I hear Draco lean back and exhale with a slight giggle. I then grit my teeth thinking to myself 'what did I just do?'

"Detention." Then he walks away while throwing his cape over his torso. I waited a moment while thinking to myself before I sat down. I looked at him and stared till I had to blink. When I did I started to talk in a voice that sounded very upset. Like when a mom is upset with a child.

"What was that? I just took the bullet for you and you don't say thanks?!" I said as quietly as I most possibly could without yelling.

"Look, you did it. I didn't ask you to." He said like he just won a game. The only thing I could do was grit my teeth. So after class I walked to my next class, The Dark Arts. Hoping that he wasn't in that class, thankfully he wasn't. I sat through the whole class thinking how upset I was about Draco. After class I walked to the common room to vent out my frustration. On my way there I saw Draco heading down the steps. So to avoid him completely I walk the other way. I could feel him following me. So I sped up my pace and walked to the bridge, by the time I got there I didn't look back. I started to run, heading to the lake. There I fell to the ground wanting to empty my eyes of every tear I had but I wouldn't let myself. I stood up; I touched my face to see if maybe a tear slipped my tear ducts. I quickly turned when I hear a twig break, and there I saw Draco. So angry and full of hate I could pick up the closes rock and hit him, or punch him in his chest. I couldn't even say anything to him, but the words found their way out.

"Why! I don't understand. The only time I'm nice you just sit there." I said with a voice that made me sound as if I were crying. I couldn't stand to look at him so I walked away. "Just leave me alone and don't talk to me." I then walked away to catch my next class. Spells, I found myself there in a class with him again, but this time he sat in the front with his friends. Not once looking back at me. After the day was over I had detention, so I followed the student map to the detention room. When I walked in there I saw Draco standing there talking to a teacher. When he turned around he saw me, but no expression crossed his face. He sat in the front, so I sat in the back furthest away from him.

"No, upfront were I can see you." The teacher said. I rolled my eyes and threw my coat to the third seat from Draco. We sat there for a while till the teacher left. Then I could hear him trying to say something, so I started.

"Just save it." I said without looking at him.

"Don't you want to know why I'm here!" He said like he was the one to be upset. He said it in a tone that was intended to make me feel his anger.

"No I really don't care." I said. Then I looked at him with anger written on my entire face. "You just sat there and let me fall for your mistake; I bet you let that happen a lot." Then I looked away.

"Mistake! The only mistake I made was thinking you … ". He then stopped when the teacher walked in.

"Did I hear voices?" He said with his teach mode full on. He then glanced at his watch and told us we were free to go. So I grabbed my coat and rushed out of the room. I heard Draco trying to catch up with me, when he did he grabbed my shoulder and swung me around. The reflex kicked in and I slapped him, even though it only hit a part of his face he still looked at me with shock. I felt shocked but my face read like I did it on purpose. He then leaned closer to my face.

"Don't ever attempt that again." He whispered to my face. He then started to walk away as if what he wanted to say was gone. So I followed yelling.

"Hey! Who are you to grab me like that! I'm glad I smacked you!" I said with anger. But he kept marching on, not a word to say back. So I yelled more comments back like, 'look at me when I'm talking to you'. By the time we reach the common room I reached my arm forward to pull him closer so I could yell at him even more. But before I could reach him he turned, grabbed my arm by the wrist and pulled me close and kissed me. My eyes were wide with shock; he then took his right hand and pulled my torso closer to his. I then closed my eyes and relaxed. I started melting into his firm arms. After a while of our lips cresting each other, our bodies getting pulled together by gravity, and my whole inner core burning; I pushed him off of me. I looked at him with a faction of a smile and a whole confused face. He looked wide eyed at the floor in surprise, then at me. He then continued to walk to me with his palms facing the ceiling.

"Vedia... " . He then walked away. Racing to get to his dorm, the only thing I could do was stand there in confusion. I asked myself 'why did he just do that', and 'why didn't he say anything'. I couldn't move not even to step out of the place where I was forced to kiss him. Did I want to move, did I want the kiss? Questions like this and more raced through my head. One minute we are fighting and the next he kisses me, it doesn't make since. After a few moments that seemed to take forever, I started to force my body to move to the dorms. After opening the dorm door I hear that someone just left the boys dorm. Racing down some steps, quietly as I most possibly could, I checked to see who it was. Thought they were gone before I could see. So I walked back up the steps my head buzzing with the short memory of Draco and me. This would mean no sleep tonight as I piece together this two faced guy. So I marched into bed with my pajamas on and my mind going at the questions I laid before it. I roll over to look at the moon till I fell asleep.

The next morning I woke up to the same thing as yesterday, hair spray and 'ohhhs, awws'. So I got up put my uniform on and head down the steps. This time I didn't wait for everyone to leave, I just went with them. We were spaced out enough that we didn't touch each other but close enough to look like a heard. We continued down the steps to the dining hall. There was all the houses, sitting and eating there breakfast. I sat at my houses table; there I sat at the furthest available seat to the teachers table. After a while of sipping orange juice and munching of what food was there, I glance up to see Draco and his two friends walk in together. I got up and walked away so I wouldn't have to talk to him, but he brushed by and yelled, "Watch where you're going Lovett!" I turned and looked with a face that said bite me. He then started to walk after me; I went to the door and then started to walk faster to get away. But he caught up to me and step in front of me.

"What? What do you possibly have to say to me that you couldn't have said last night?" I asked with udder calmness.

"I was going to ask you the same. Why haven't you talked to me, I want to know what you're thinking." He asked in a voice that made it sound unconvincing.

"Because I have nothing to say and I don't have to tell you want I'm thinking, but I bet you can guess what it is that I'm thinking of." I said in a way that was to inflict humiliation. I then started to walk away, the only thing I wanted to do was get as far from him as possible. I then walked to my first class. I wanted to get there before everyone else had a partner but me. I walked fast enough that it wasn't a jog or a run. I was so caught up in my thoughts that I wasn't watching were I was going. So by the time I found were I was and how to get back, I walked slower to get to class. But because I got lost I was still late, so I sat in the same seat as I did the other day. There I tried my hardest to focus on the lesson thought my mind kept bringing me back to Draco. I was so caught up in thought that when someone sat beside me I didn't realize it; they then put their hand on my shoulder to get me to come to. When I looked it was the same girl that asked me about hitting Rebecka and the same one that Rebecka was yelling at the other day. She asked me if I needed someone to sit with I nodded and said sure. She then sat there for at least half the class not saying anything. Then the question that was clearly eating her away inside finally broke through.

"Are you and Draco together? I saw you and him outside the dining hall." She looked at the desk the entire time, as if she were scared of me. Then she forced herself to glance at me really quick, but only to look back down at the desk.

"No, we're not I hate him with a passion." I said while looking away to show that it was ok to talk to me. Then she looked at me for a few seconds then back at the floor. Before the class ended she looked at me on last time to say something.

"Rebecka made me ask." She said quickly as if I told her to tell me. So I smiled, then class was dismissed. I then let her stand first, and then I added a small comment.

"You should tell her that we are. It will be funny." She looked at me as if she saw a ghost.

"Um, sure." She said like she wasn't going to, but she wanted to get me to like her. So then I told her it's ok that she didn't have to, but if she did that if anything was to happen I would protect her. Then I walked down the hall to go to my next class. When I got there we were learning how to defend ourselves from some kind of creature. I wasn't paying attention, so the only thing I did was write notes. After a class of trying to catch up, I headed to the dining hall for lunch. When I got there I sat at an empty section and started selecting a few things. I wasn't really hungry so I only had figure food, and I was also reading a book. I didn't want to get the book dirty so I closed it and pushed it away. When I did I saw that Draco was looking at me with his peripheral. I was done eating, so I looked forward and walked away. While walking down the hall I decided to go to the court yard. Good thing I did, there I found Rebecka yelling at the girl from my class. So I walked calmly into the court yard.

"What's going on guys?" I asked with a small smile on my face. The girl looked down and smiled like she knew a secret.

"Nothing that concerns you 'new girl'." Rebecka said as if she was caught doing something that wasn't allowed. Then she looked at the girl and then at me with a smile. "So you and Draco are together?" She smiled bigger. "Then I guess you won't mind me asking him." She then walked closer and looked me up and down. I walked closer to her just to say in a forte whisper.

"Don't talk to her, much less me in that tone of voice." She looked at my face and her smile faded away. "You remembered what happened last time you talked to me like that. So leave her alone before I knock the rest of your teeth out." I then walked away when my hair was pulled; I grabbed her hand and pulled her for-arm over my head, while I bent over to help throw her over me. She was on the ground gasping for air. I then bent over her and smiled and raised my hands and shoulders. Then i said. "Don't mess with me." Then walked away, but before I could get to the doorway three teachers rushed over to see the scene. They then told me that I had detention and carried Rebecka to the nurse.

So after the day was over and the questions of the fight, I walked to detention. I walked slowly hoping I would be the only one this time. When I walked into the room there was no one to be seen so I smiled. Then someone walked behind me and then around me, thinking it was the teacher. To my disappointment it was Draco. My smile turned into shock, so I just followed him to the front of the room. We sat in the same seats as we did the other day. We waited till the teacher left to say anything, or even move. When he did it was a few minutes of silence, to ensure that he was really gone. After a while Draco moved in his seat.

"So I heard you told Rebecka today that we are together." He said looking away.

"Ya, it got under her skin, so I said it." I said looking away, after thinking about it for a while I started to feel like we were together. In the way that older couples are, they argue but they stay with each other. I looked at him to see his expression; he was staring at the ground, and pushing his lips together.

"Don't say stuff like that, it makes me have a bad reputation." He said this in a voice that was trying to sound angry. I looked at him and began teasing him, just to see how far I could push before he brakes.

"Well what if that was what I want?" I said.

"Don't if that gets around .. just don't okay you don't understand anything do you?" he said this while still looking at the ground. I wanted him to look at me so I kept on. With questions like 'what would be the worst thing people could say' and others like it.

"Look, you can't go around saying stuff like that." He said in a voice that I couldn't register as his voice; it was so calm and sincere.

"Why, it's not like you haven't thought of it. You kissed me yesterday, so don't stand there and tell me that you don't like me. Even just a little." I said slowly to keep the volume down. I started to move in my sit to get a better view of the situation. He then stood up so fast that his desk rattled around for a few seconds. When it was done moving he waited out a moment of silence while looking at me with a face of frustration.

"You really don't understand. You need to stop. Leave me alone and stay as far from me as possible." He said this in a voice that sounded angry but behind it sounded sincere. He then dashed out of the room. I waited a moment and then headed after him. I walked swiftly down the hall, when I saw him jutting his head back and forth as if he were arguing with himself. I ran up to him till I was by his side and in the most concerning voice I could find I said.

"Please just tell me what I don't understand."

"Nothing, I can't say!" he said before I finish pronouncing my last word. I was so upset that I stood in front of him, he walked around, and then I stood there again. We did this for a while till he gave up. He looked up at the ceiling with his jaw out. Then down at me with a face of anger, but this wasn't his usual face.

"Draco, just tell me, if you do I'll stop telling people we're together." I said slowly while thinking each word threw. It took a while but he finally looked down at me.

"We need to get back before we get in anymore trouble." He said in a soft voice. I walked to his side and then we walked together back to the room. The whole way there he looked around, as if someone were watching us. When we got back to the room we sat in our seats. There we sat for the rest of the time in silence. After a few moments of waiting the teacher came in and told us we could leave. We then grabbed our stuff and walked back down the hall.

"You didn't answer me." I said while looking where I was walking.

"Cause I have nothing to say." He said while looking at me. I looked at him to see what his expression was at first it was plan then a small smile broke there.

"No, I really can't say. I'm not allowed to talk about it." We then walked half way to the dorms when I asked.

"Why are you going to detention?" I asked just too feel in the silence.

"Cause I'm always late to class and I will always have detention till I show up on time." He said slowly. Then I looked at him and asked why he is always late.

"That's something else I can't say." So I looked at him till I had to watch were I was going. We then walked into the common room. I stepped in front of him one last time.

"Please tell me, it's going to get to me if I don't know." I looked back and forth between his eyes to see if he was going to tell me the truth. He stepped closer to me and stood straight up and tilled his head back slightly to seem taller. Then looking down at me he said.

"I'm in Lord Voldemort's cult, and if they heard I was in a relationship with someone they would …. Get rid of them." He said while looking straight into my eyes. I didn't know what to say so I just stood there trying my hardest to not show any sign of emotion. While thinking to myself of what to say next he pulled his sleeve up and showed me his tattoo, to prove that it was true. I looked at it with disbelief, I looked at it carefully. I studied its every design, to make sure it was true. When he then pulled his sleeve down, he waited to hear any comments.

"Ok …." I said with a reaction that made it seem that it didn't bother me. "That's all I wanted, I wanted the truth." He looked at me with anger and confusion. To make it more convincing I hugged him gently. He waited to put his arms around me, but I wasn't letting go till he did. When he finally did it, it was a while till I could let him go. I looked at him and smiled. Then walked to my dorm, when I got half way there I turned around to say good night. When I lay down in my bed I added the new information that I got to this puzzle of a guy. It was then that I found myself falling harder for him. I then closed my eyes tight making it go away. I didn't want to like him, I wasn't ready for this, I needed time to think. That's what I did all night till I fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning I woke up a little early, than I normally do. I stayed in bed for a few to see if anyone was getting up. When no one did I just got up and did my regular routine. Then I went down to the common room to see if someone else woke up. I got to the bottom of the steps, and then I looked at my watch. I would be another hour or so before anyone woke up. I threw my arm down and exhaled, just as I did that Draco came walking down the steps with a confused face.

"What are you doing up so early?" He said calmly while still looking confused.

"Um, I don't know really." I said while looking the other way with a smile but also in confusion. "What about you, if I may ask?" I said while looking at him.

"Just about to head out." He said while looking at the ground. So I looked away.

"Oh, well I was gunna walk around, but if you think I should stay I will." I said this to see if he wanted me to walk with him, or if he really wanted me to stay, depending on where he was going. He looked at me and smiled while straightening up his back and tilting his head backwards. Then he walked a few steps closer.

"You can walk with me." He said it in a way that he knew that I was trying to get him to ask me this. I smiled and nodded. He then leaned down to kiss me on the forehead. We then walked out of the common room and down the steps. Before we knew it we were at the bridge. There we walked slower than what our normal pace was.

"So, how does it work?" I asked while watching where I was going.

"How dose what work?" he said as if he knew what I was talking about, but wanted me to say his name.

"Being in the cult." I said slowly to choose my words carefully. We then looked at each other, he with his serious face and me waiting for my answer.

"Well, it's … he chooses you and you accept. Or you decline and he kills you." He said with his head tilled back and his face was plan. Then he looked at me, then stepped in front of me and leaned on the edge of the bridge, so I did also. There we looked at the river below us as I thought of more questions to ask. We would look back and forth to each other and smile then look away. I wanted to think of at least one last question before we had to leave for breakfast.

"What if someone was to actually want to be in the cult?" I said this question like it was an interview. I then thought to myself what the answer could be. Then he quickly interrupted my train of thought when he looked at me with a confused and concern face.

"Oh! No no no I don't want to be in it I just asked to fill in the space!" I said. He looked at me with a smile that I've never seen before, it was so bright. He laughed and pushed himself off the wood he was leaning on. Then came close and looked at me and said.

"If that were to happen I would think he would put them through the ringer, and then maybe accept them." Then he came closer and held me and smiled a small smile and kissed me on the forehead, and hugged me. We stood there for a while and then walked back to the school for breakfast. On the way there I asked, "Are we secretly together? Cause you act like it but you say no." he looked down then at me and with a painful face he said were just friends. I looked at him with such confusion. By the time we go to the dining hall and I sat a little ways away from him, I contemplated to myself, why would he kiss me then say were just friends? It didn't bother me as much, but I could still feel the mark he left on my forehead.

After breakfast we walked close to each other but not to close to make it look like we were walking with each other. Then when I looked over he was gone, I stopped for a few seconds in the hall to look around for him. But he wasn't to be found, so I just headed on to class. There I sat in the back hoping he would come in late and sit with me. When half of the class pasted and he didn't come I started to get upset about this only being friends' thing. But then he came in, breathing heavily, he then looked at the teacher to see if he was looking.

"So what did I miss?" he said after he caught his breath.

"Um, we are learning how to make a potion for rehabilitation." I said.

"Oh, ok then." He said then while still trying to catch his breath.  
We sat there the entire class not saying a thing. Every now and again we would pass looks but that was about it. After class was dismissed we headed to the hall for our next class.

"Well, I guess I'll see ya later then." I said while looking between him and the floor.

"Well, um do you want to sit with me at lunch?" he said while looking at the floor, and then he leaned down closer to my face. "Were friends, and that's what friends do."

"Um … sure, I guess." I said slowly to ensure that it was what I wanted.

"Great, see ya." He said as fast he could and turned around. I stayed there thinking to myself. Then I walked to my next class. The class went by pretty fast seeing as I wasn't paying much attention. Then after class was over I started heading to lunch. By the time I got there only Draco's friends were there, so I started to turn around and walk away to the court yard when Draco walked behind me and put his hand on my upper back.

"Come on, let's eat." He then guided me all the way to the table; there we sat with one person between us. He was so comfortable taking about things his father owns and every now and again looking at me. I didn't say a word; I was too busy studying him. It was quite in my mind as I watched him, and then someone addresses me from down the table. He asked my parents name and where I come from, I hesitated. I looked at Draco and then at the boy who asked the question.

"Um, I really don't know. My mom keeps up with all that. Not me." I said while sipping some water. He then started to whisper about me not being 100% wizard, a mud blood. So I got up with a loud bang and walked away. It was more of a dash then walking. After a few steps out of the dining hall I was called from behind.

"Vedia, what was that?!" Draco said while following me out of the dining hall. I stopped when he said my name. I waited to say anything till I could see him. When he stepped in front of me, he had more to say.

"Why did you act like that?" he said while still being upset.

"Because, just because I don't know my family history. That doesn't give him the right to insult me, especially when I'm just down the table." I said in a very upset voice. In the middle of me talking he threw his arms up and walked in a circle while looking at the ceiling.

"Vedia, who cares, if it were to get anything more out of control you know I, would handle it." He said while putting his hands on my arms.

"And you don't think that that was out of control." He then threw his hands to his side and stepped around me. I followed his every move with my eyes.

"You're over reacting." He said while walking around me. "I'm done!" he was walking backwards back to the dining hall, when he was done he turned and walked back. I was relieved that I didn't have to worry about us anymore, but I was also upset that we weren't us anymore. I waited a few then exhaled while placing one hand on my forehead and the other on my side. When I cleared my mind I walked to the court yard. There I dropped to the ground, and laid under the tree. I could feel my head spinning from all the mixed emotions. I couldn't think clearly, my head was throbbing from the sudden drop to the ground. I could feel myself falling asleep, so to prevent this from happening, I got up and walked to class. I was early this time, so I took a desk on the side of the room. It had a pillar blocking the stand were the teacher stood and it had two other desks beside it. This made it hard to get to it, so when Draco can in late he wouldn't be able to sit with me. That's if he didn't want to get caught being late.

Class started, we were learning what ingredients don't mix well. After a while I start to look around for Draco, and when I looked he showed up at his normal time. So I quickly looked away hoping he would see me, or sit with me. But no amount of hiding my face he found himself sitting at the next closest desk to me. Trying to avoid making noise, he sat there with a student from our house. He started talking to him, and they would look at me then back to their conversation. As if to show me that they were talking about me and desperately wanted me to know. I tried my hardest to look at the front, at the least. I didn't want them to think that I cared about whatever they were talking about. I also tried my hardest to not show any facial expressions. But every minute of them talking wore at my more and more to where I was about to snap. I tried telling myself that they were talking about the class. But it didn't work; I still could feel my ears burning. So when class was over I broke away from my set and bolted out of there, but only to be stopped physically by Draco and his friend from class. When they were standing in front of me I realized it was the boy from breakfast.

"Vedia I have something to say." The boy said to me, then looking at Draco. "I'm sorry if I offended you at breakfast. I didn't mean any of it." He said looking back at me.

"It's ok." I said with a smile at the boy, and then I looked at Draco with hatred. And then walking between them both, brushing by. I walked at a slower pace feeling better that the boy apologized. I still wanted Draco to say something to. He told me he was done earlier, but before I could make it to my next class I was pulled into a room with my mouth covered, my reflex cut in again and I elbowed who grabbed me. They moved just enough to where it didn't hurt them much. When I turned around it was Draco.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" I said while trying to catch my breath from the excitement. He looked outside the door to see if anyone had seen him do that or if anyone was coming.

"What did you do that for?!" I said while whipping my mouth. He ran up to me and said that we needed to leave the school to talk. So he pulled my arm and took me to the lake. There he explained how there was an inspector there to survey his work and he wanted me to say as far away from him as possible, to not even look at him.

"I don't understand, why?" I said while shaking my head and looking at the ground.

"Remember when I told you that if I were in a relationship with anyone they would get rid of them. Well this is it." He said while looking around. He took one last look around and said. "Forget you ever knew me."

"What if I can't, I would. I wouldn't be able to do that Draco!" I cried out as he started to walk away. I stood there hoping he would come back. He only turned and waved his wand with some words. I fell to the ground, hitting it hard I slowly fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

I woke up to find myself in a bed with the nurse over me and the girl from the court yard. My eyes are fading in and out as I try to see the room around me, it takes a while but I finally see straight.

"Are you okay Mrs. Lovett?" The nurse asks me. I look at her then the girl.

"Why am I here, how did I get here?" I ask in panic.

"Oh no, calm down you took one hard fall out there, you don't need to rush it." The nurse said while pushing me down to the bed. I couldn't remember getting to this place. I wondered why I was here and why was my head hurting? I wanted to get out of there and find something, I felt like there was somewhere I needed to be, but I for the life of me I couldn't remember. I asked the girls name so that way I would know something. She told me it was Amanda. It didn't ring a bell, but then again nothing did, I lost all memory the nurse told me. It was strange not knowing what I had forgotten, seeing as I felt like I never knew it in the first place. Some teachers walked in and said that there was something wrong. That no matter how much medicine I took I wouldn't remember. I held my breath and thought to myself, 'come on you have to remember something'. When I did this my head started to hurt, I took one hand and touched my forehead. When I did one teacher walked over, and the nurse told me not to push it. I looked around and remembered were I was and a lot more things about me. They told me that was excellent, and then asked if I remembered who did this to me. I shook my head and tried to remember again. The nurse grabbed my hand and told me no, she then explained that if I try to hard I could go into a coma. For the shock of to much information at once.  
When I was able to go to the dorms, I went straight to bed. The whole way there Amanda guided me, looking at me as little as possible.

"Have I been mean to you?" I asked her, I stopped walking to ensure that she answered me.

"No, you're the nicest person I've ever met." She said with a small smile. We then finished walking to the dorms. I couldn't believe that this had happened to me. When we reached the common room no one was there, we then walked into the girl's dorm. There all the girls were talking lightly to each other, but when I walked in they stopped. I looked around and they rolled over and went to bed. So I changed and did the same. I lay in my bed with my head hurting the whole night.

The next morning, I woke up with a head ach. When I jumped out of bed and hit the closest table to me; everyone flinched, I then apologized. I got up and dressed for the day, and went to breakfast, then all my classes. This happened for a month or two. Day after day I remembered more and then forgot sometimes. I was remembering, little by little. But there was something, every now and again I would have this longing, like when you lose your teddy bear for the first time. You won't stop looking till you find it. I would ask around, but everyone had no idea what I was talking about. Classes pasted me by and so did feelings, I could feel someone watching me. Though I would never find them, it made me feel insecure.  
One day I walked to the bridge and there I felt like I was happy. Like I was a part of this place, people walked past me and they looked at me with confusion when I stood looking out over the bridge or when I would sit by the lake. Thought the one person that stuck with me was when a boy looked at me with a face that I didn't registered the emotion on it. I didn't get the chance to see him again. Till one day I recognized him in my class, I spent the whole time looking at him. I couldn't think of where I knew him from. I followed him one day to talk to him. Though I let him get away. I did this for several days, but every time he would get away from me, and then I finally talked to him.

"Hey." I said while chasing after him. He turned with his jaw together. "Do I know you?" I asked while looking at his eyes.

"No, you don't." he said while looking away. The he continued on to class. I couldn't believe I didn't know him; he seemed so familiar, like an old foe. I couldn't put my figure on it.

Then one day I saw a girl with a bruise on her face, she looked at me and then away while covering her face. This happened across the court yard, my head started hurt so much I almost dropped to the ground; I grabbed my head and held it with a tight grip while clinching my teeth tightly. There was this sound pulsing threw my head while this happened, I could feel my voice screaming but I couldn't hear it. When it was over I opened my eyes wide.

"Rebecka!" I said in a whisper. I stood up slowly while still looking at the ground. When I looked out to her everyone looked at me in confusion. I looked at her and remember her, but there was something more to it. I could feel it. There was something I needed to remember, but what? I walked back to the dorm to look for something. Everything was in place, everything I owned was there. So what was I missing?

I then went back to my third class; there I sat in a seat to myself. I looked around to see if something was out of place. I looked at every student, and there clothes. I inspected every inch of the room, but nothing helped. It bothered me so much to not remember. Class was over and I walked to my last class for the day. I walked slowly the whole way there as I felt the walls. I wanted to try and make myself remember, but I also didn't want to be in a coma. When I finally showed up for class I sat in a set close to the back, so I could think. But before I could pick out a seat, the white headed boy walked up behind me with two if his friends, they never looked at me. I watched their every movement, till they sat down, and just before the white headed boy sat down he looked at me really quick with is lips together. I could feel there was something there, but he said no, that he didn't know me. I found a seat without looking and sat down. There I spent the whole class staring at him. Thinking to myself how we know each other. We had the same hair color almost maybe we were related, no, that wasn't it I would have known, I remembered my family. Everything slowed down in my mind I saw his every move in a slower pace. Why couldn't I remember? I had to talk to him, but he already told me, he seemed constantly upset. Maybe that wasn't a good idea. The class ended and I was hesitant to move from my seat, but when he moved from his seat I got out of mine and moved closer to talk to him. I reached down to grab my coat and other belongings, when I looked up he was gone. I felt like I missed an important flight, or when you miss an opportunity you'll never get again. I didn't want to spend the rest of my time here at school chasing after lost memories. I didn't want to be after a guy who was here in a second and gone just like that. I walked down the hall slowly while thinking to myself. I didn't want to be after something that I can't remember; maybe it was for the best. That I didn't remember.

I got to the dorms, and there I found half of the students from my house in the common room. So to think more clearly I went to the dorms to be alone. When I walked in the dorm I saw Rebecka and Amanda talking. I looked at Rebecka with a face of confusion. She looked at me and said that she was just leaving, and walked away. I watched her leave, and then I walked over to Amanda. There we sat on my bed; we talked of her day then of mine. We would laugh and joke around. Then I got serious and asked her an important question.

"Um, do you think you could tell me anything, something that I don't already know." I asked while looking at my hands. She looked around and brushed her hair back behind her ear.

"The nurse said the only thing you don't remember is who did this to you. But you should know everything else." She said. She really didn't know that I was missing something.

"Ya I know that but, there is something else I'm missing." I said while getting up and walking to the window. "I can tell that I don't have all my memory back. I keep feeling like there is something missing. Like I know something that I shouldn't know and my mind is covering it up." I shook my head when it started to hurt.

"Don't hurt yourself, the nurse said take it easy. That you could…"

"Ya I know a coma. Look I'm sorry but I have to go." I said while interrupting her.

"But it's almost lights out." She said while I was walking out the door. I then proceeded to walk down the steps to the common room. With my jacket in hand I walked down the moving stair cases. When I reached to bottom I put my jacket on, I could feel the temperature difference already. I folded my arms tight and walked outside. There I reached the bridge. I leaned against some wood. There was a moon out but it wasn't bright. I started to hear things, I got scared. I looked around to see what it was, but I couldn't see a thing, but I knew which direction it was coming from. So I turned and walked to the lake thinking there in the open I could see what it was. When I got to the lake I looked out over it. The moon seemed brighter here, as it reflected off the steal lake. I heard something move and I turn so fast I almost fell. I was frozen with fear and the cold didn't help much. I waited to see who it was, when they got closer and stepped into the moon light I saw who it was. It was Draco; he stood quite a distance from me. I then put my hands on my chest and exhaled with a nervous laugh.

"Oh my goodness you scared me. What are you doing out so late?" I said while trying to catch my breath. I couldn't see his facial reaction he was too far away to see it. He then looked down and walked away.

"Hey, wait up I want to talk to you." I said while chasing after him. He was swinging his arms and walking with heavy steps. I walked after him and with every step I sped up, trying to catch up. Till I finally stepped in front of him, there I put my hand oh his forearm to make sure he wasn't going anywhere.

"I want to ask you something." I said while catching my breath. He looked away from me, up and the down. "I know there is something between us, and don't stand there and say that there isn't because I know you feel it to." I said in a firm voice. I let go of his arm. "Just tell me, all I want to know is the truth." After saying this he looked at me with a face like I shouldn't have just said that.

"There is nothing between us, just forget you ever saw me." He said this while grabbing my arm. The second he touched me, my head started to ach, I fell into a fetal position and cradled my head in my hands. I saw everything that has ever happened to me flash before me in this small amount of time I could feel my face burning. It then stopped all at once, I opened my eyes and I was on my knees. I was holding my head still in shock, I saw Draco over me with his hand on my back. And in a whisper, I said while looking at Draco with wide open eyes.

" I remember."


	5. Chapter 5

I looked around and then back at him. He looked at me with confusion, and then I looked at him with shock.

"Yes, I remember you made me forget, but…" I said trialing off, still trying to think of why he did it. I couldn't believe he would do this to me. Then I remembered. "You were protecting me, but I would have been fine on my own." I stood straight up and started to walk away. He called my name out, trying to stop me, but I wouldn't stop. I couldn't believe he did this to me, I didn't understand. I would have done what he told me to do till it blew over. He continued to call my name in an attempt to try and stop me. I ran the whole way to the dorm room. But before I could get completely there Draco stepped in front of me and grabbed me by both of my arms. I raised them up and down, trying to get away but no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't.

"Vedia would you please hear me out, I need to explain." He said while following my face as I tried to escape.

"No, I can't listen to you anymore I need to think by myself, alone." I said while I clinched my teeth in an attempt to block tears.

"I didn't mean for your memory to come back…"

"Oh, you didn't want me to remember what you did to me; if I did that to someone I wouldn't ether. That's a nice thing to do Draco, you take someone's memory and then you don't expect them to get it back, how…"

"I didn't want to hurt you." He yelled at me. I was shocked at not only the words but the volume as well. "Yes, I didn't want you to get hurt over me; there is no way we can ever be together." He then let me go and took a few steps back. I lunged forward and kissed him. He grabbed me tight and leaned back. I could tell what he was thinking, and I would agree. I didn't want to ever let go ether. But we did.

"I'm sorry for this Vedia, I didn't mean for any of this to happen." He said in a soft whisper.  
"What are you two doing outside of your dorms at this hour?" Professor Snape said from down a few steps. We quickly let each other go and looked at one another.

"Detention the both of you, and I better see you first thing in the morning." He said while gliding down the steps. We looked at each other again and walked back to the dorms.  
The whole way there we didn't look at each other, till we walked in the front door. When we got to the common room, it was like time was slowing down. I could feel every little thing. We held each other as we kissed again; it was the most passionate kiss I've ever felt. He walked backwards towards the couch, and I followed. He lay there, undoing his buttons little by little; I looked down as he looked up at me. It was slow, in my mind, which made it more intense. I then lay on top and kissed him again, hands wondered up and down as we spent that night on the couch. It was perfect, or the closest thing to it. I couldn't tell if it was real, or not. Every breath we took in unison was quite. He was all I wanted at the moment. Nothing on this earth could make me feel the way I did that night.

The next morning I woke up early to get myself together before anyone woke up. When I did I was alone. I looked around to see if he would come back, and tell me good morning. But he never did, so I went about my routine. I got up and ready for school. Some girls woke up, but I didn't really notice. I got half way down a flight of steps when my name was called. I looked around slowly, still buzzed from last night. It was Amanda; she asked me if I would walk her to breakfast, I nodded. We didn't say much the whole way there, though she didn't talk much period. But it seemed that this time was different; when we got to the dining hall she told me how she heard sounds from the common room. I choked on my orange juice.

"Are you okay?" she asked while handing me a paper towel.

"Yah, I'm alright." I said while coughing and wiping my face.

"But ya, I didn't see anything, but no one has seen Draco or Rebecka this morning. So everyone has said that it was them two last night." She said this while looking dead into my eyes.

"Oh, well lucky them, I bet they had fun." I said, forcing the words out of my mouth. I thought to myself as I twirled my locket around in my figures. It didn't really bother me that everyone was saying that. I knew what really happened.

I then thought of everything that happened last night, from the touch of our bodies brushing by each other, to the sounds. I sat there till Amanda reached over and touched my arm. Telling me we had to head for class. From the dining hall I walked to my first class, and there I sat in the back waiting for Draco. I wrote an extra set of note for him, so he wouldn't fall behind. I waited half the class; I would look at the door and back. Sometimes I would get yelled at by the teacher for not looking ahead. Finally he walked in looking at the teacher the whole time; it was slower than his normal pace. When he sat by my side, he looked at me with a warm smile. I smiled back, I wanted to kiss him so bad, but I wanted him to kiss me first. Just so I would know the rules. When I should kiss him, and what to look for, or when not to and how would I be able to tell. I didn't want to be blunt and just come out and ask him, so I let him lead. We played around in class, of what time we had left. We would write notes when we got caught talking, and we would draw doodles. We would stare at one another for a long period of time till one of us broke it. Then it came time for our next class, there we said goodbye in the hall and he looked straight up and then kissed me on the forehead. So I know that farewells are when you can show affection. We went our separate ways. I would look back to see him one last time and he would be there walking backwards, and then I look down and he would turn the corner. Or some days he would be gone before I could look. I then walked to my next class, there I would copy notes from Amada, and we would crack up with jokes and mark on each other's papers. We had fun, she helped me and I helped her. Though it was tough to tell anyone, about Draco and I. It had to stay a secret, though I could feel that some people were catching on sometimes, then we would make up a fight and everyone dropped it. It was perfect the hidden love we had, it was so amazing to be with someone that I felt safe and comfortable with. At lunch it would be hard, we had to keep the looks to a minimum. But we had fun, friends/enemies during the day, and a lover at night, we were perfect for each other. We didn't talk much of small subjects. We didn't have to, a look said it all. We would know the emotion they felt by one look.

We finished up the day and there we faced detention, though we didn't think much of it. Seeing as we would still be together. We waited till the teacher left to talk. When he did, all we did was move closer to each other.

"So, how was your day?" I said to start the conversation.

"Good, now that I am in your presence." He said with a giggle, I followed while looking down. I reached over and grabbed his hand. We looked at each other for a while and talked of the day. He talked of how his friends would say they are failing and he could show his passing grades. Thanks to me, and then of how he would almost broke something in one of his classes. I would then laugh and tell him how a friend of mine told me of it but didn't know the students name. We would laugh together, then after a sentence it would be quite as we smiled at one another. We would talk of how some teachers' aggravate each other, or how a student almost caught on to our relationship. He would reassure that no one will notice. We left detention and went to the dorms, and there we said goodnight and kissed. As I got to my room and my pajamas were on, I would sit in the window and think of how lucky I am to have him. I would imagine life without him, I couldn't.

Another month passed and half the school left for the holidays, I called my parents and said happy holidays. I was staying here during the break; we didn't have enough money to send me there and back. So I just stayed. I walked down to the common room and said goodbye to Amanda as she walked out the door with half her luggage. I walked down the steps and hung out the door till she was out of my sight. As I turned to walk back to the common room, Draco grabbed me from behind.

"Oh!" I squealed as he picked me up and twirled me around. It was snowing outside, as the common room was warm. It was almost glowing as the tree was lite, with our house colors hanging from the branches. I looked at him and kissed his nose. He looked at me and we smiled. I hugged him back tightly, he then kissed my forehead.

"Are you going home for the holidays?" I asked, with true concern.

"No, my old man wouldn't know if I was there or not. Besides, he is always busy." He said while sneaking in a kiss. I kissed back firmly. There were only a few others staying behind. And all were couples, so they kept to themselves.

We ate dinner together, it felt like a proper date, and then we walked about the school. While we walked, we talked of things we liked and things we didn't like. We would stop sometime to better explain with our hands or body movements. We were so close, I never wanted to say good bye. It was like I found something that everyone is looking for. I didn't want to think about anything past this.

We reached the common room and there we sat to the closest couch to the fireplace. We started talking of prior gifts we had gotten from family members. I told him how I once got a sweater from an aunt that was blind and she knitted it herself. Or once I got a puppy, then the next month it ran away. He told me of how he got a pet snake, and I laughed and told him how appropriate. Then once he got a cape, and when he was playing in the back yard, he lost it. We then got sleepy in each other's arms. So we walked slowly up the girl's dorm and there we got ready for bed. We brushed our teeth in rhythm with each other, or tried our hardest to find a pair of pajamas that matched just to be silly. We slept in my bed, which was the closest to the window, so we could watch the snow fall. We talked to each other till we both fell asleep.

The next morning I woke up to him brushing my hair from my cheek. I woke up and hugged him tightly. He told me that it was Christmas and that he had something for me.

"No, really you didn't have to." I said as I hid under the covers.

"No, I really did have to and I wanted to, so I did." He said slowly so I would understand it past my morning grogginess. I covered my face thinking to myself, 'how embarrassing'.

"Hold on." I said as I got up and walked to the other end of the room. I opened the trunk against the wall and in it a pulled out a wrapped present. I smiled while rubbing my eyes. He looked down a giggled.

"No, I really did have to and I wanted to, so I did." I said with a smile on. We giggled and looked at one another. We pasted out gifts to each other and held them while looking at them. Then we looked at each other one last time.

"Open mine first." I said real quickly, before he could start to open the paper. He looks at me with a smile and says lets open them together. So we look at the presents and slowly start to tare the paper. We would look at one another every now and again. I got all the tape and paper off mine and there was a small box that had a company logo on it, with a diamond above it. I looked at him with a shocked face. He just smiled and looked at the box. I waited till he looked at me the second time and there I found my locket, I was slightly relived. Then I opened it, and in it I found two pictures from the same picture, it was a picture he must have taken while we were at the lake. One side had his picture and the other was of me looking at him. The pictures were so beautiful, I couldn't believe he did this, not only have I never told anyone of my locket, but it meant so much to me that he did this for me.

"Like it, I didn't know what to get you, so I thought that since you wear this all the time… you might have wanted to put some pictures in it." He said while grabbing my hand. I lunged forward and hugged him and whispered thank you in his ear. I smiled and told him to open mine. I told him it wouldn't be as amazing as the one he gave me, but to only have him to laugh and reassure me that wasn't possible. There he tore the paper neatly, as if he was going to keep the paper and tape included. When I closed my eyes thinking he wouldn't like it.

"Oh cool this it's amazing." He said, I thought at first he didn't mean it but said it to be polite, but he really did like it. It was a journal, that when you wrote in it, the writing disappeared till you said a spell. I was happy that he liked it; I told him that I didn't really know what to get him.

"Well, I think you did very well, thanks." He said as he leaned in for a kiss. And just before he kissed me I said you're welcome. Then I told him thanks for my gift that he doesn't know how much it means to me.

After the gifts we went to breakfast. There were only a few people so we were free for personal affection. We ate and talked of how great it will be when we can be our selves one day. Though we didn't talk much of the future, because he believed that we wouldn't be together forever, I wanted to think this was forever. We talked more of how we liked our presents. He was explaining to me how he was thinking of getting the journal after Christmas, and I explained to him how this gift was personal and how I would treat it with care.

"So, what's the meaning behind the locket, like how did you get it and who gave it to you?" he asked while eating on a biscuit.

"Well, I got it from my grandmother, of which who I'm named after. She told me that it was hers. Which that's whose pictures were in there." Then I lifted the edge of my picture in my locket to see if they were still there and he told me they are behind ours. So I smiled and continued. "She told me he was her soul mate and that she would never be with another man, but he pasted away before his time. She followed right after him, so they were together shortly after his death." I said while looking at him with a small smile.

"Wow that is so sweet." He said while reaching over and touching my hand.

"I want that to be us, I want to be with you forever and if I can't, I don't want anyone else." I said while looking down. He smiled and we got up and walked around. We talked of stories that reflected out lives. We talked of how I wanted this to be forever so much, and how he knew it couldn't last forever. I told myself in my head that I'm just a teenager that I don't know love, but I would always lose, this was so close to love. If this wasn't love, I wouldn't want love. All I wanted was him and to be by his side, I wanted this forever and eternity. He told me that no matter how much I wanted something, it doesn't always mean I'll get it. I stopped to think the words threw, he didn't say it in a mean way. He just told me something that I really needed to think about. It was funny to me how he was so sure that this wouldn't live to see past school, and I was so sure that it would. Even if that means I make it happen. As I thought of stories that reflected our story, I thought of Romeo and Juliet. He was my Romeo and I was his Juliet, though they both died before they could really be together.


	6. Chapter 6

We spent the entire break together in each other's arms. It was so amazing to be true around each other with out worrying about others. When the holidays were over and everyone got back to school, we had a hard time getting back into what we were before, the students who barely knew each other. It took about a week till we fell back into our normal schedules, it was difficult, but we got back into our rhythm. Things went smooth, for a few days. We had lunch with our friends, and hanged after school in detention sometimes. But then one day things changed. I never saw it coming.

I woke up one morning to the sounds of talking in the common room. I sat up in bed and there I found that there was no one in the dorm. So I got out of bed slowly thinking that everyone was just pulling a prank, or maybe we were still on a break. I walked down the steps slowly and there I saw all the students in my house there in the common room talking quietly. No one stopped talking when I entered the room, so they weren't talking about me, is what I thought to myself. I walked around with my arms folded to protect my body from the cold. I looked around trying to pick up on the conversations that were taking place around me. Then Amanda walked over to me and placed her hand on my arm.

"Hey, have you heard." She asked to make sure that I didn't before she just told me.

"No, what's going on, why is everyone up this early?" I ask while looking around for Draco.

"There are a few students missing. We don't know why, but there are quite a few that weren't in their beds this morning." She said while looking between the wall and me. I looked around and asked if she knew who all was missing from our house. She didn't know anyone, so there for she didn't know who was missing. I told her thanks, and that I was going to change. When I walked back to the dorm, I changed into some normal clothes and a warm jacket. Our house was on the ground floor, so I could sneak out the window. As I got out the window closest to my bed I took off looking for Draco. I looked at the bridge, the lake, and the other bridge by Hagretts. But he was no were to be found. I finally went to the woods. I've never been inside there, but I've heard of students getting lost in here all the time. So I had to be careful, and watch where I was going. I walked the same direction so I could just turn around and walk right back out. But as always, that's not the case, I got lost and no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't find my way back. I left the dorm with no one knowing so no one knows where I am, or to even be looking for me. I didn't know what to do, should I hug a tree till I see someone. If I got caught out here I would be in so much trouble. So I kept walking till it got dark. Then I saw a yellow light flickering. I started running to it when I heard a voice that sounded, not right like it was horse. So I slowed down and waited to hear some names. No names were said, but I felt something behind me so I turned quickly and there standing was Draco. I exhaled quietly, and placed my hand on his chest.

"You scared me, what are you…" I stopped when I saw that something wasn't right. He looked at me like he has never seen me before. His eyes screamed 'leave now!', but I couldn't move.

"You shouldn't be hear." He said. And then started to walk away, I wanted to follow him but I turned and started to walk away. I felt so scared of him; I didn't know I was walking away till I stopped in front of a tree. There I stood thinking of what he said and the look he had. It was strange. It was quite all around me, after my thoughts went away. Then I turned and there was Draco's dad standing relatively close to me, I jumped back and he looked at me with a stuck up attitude. I stood there waiting to see if he would talk.

"You know, I've known of you and Draco since the beginning. I can see everything he does." He said in a slow firm voice. Thinking of that made me feel exposed. "Run along, there is nothing for you here." he said while rising his head and looking down. I looked at him for a while till his eyes dilated. I then took off running; I wanted to get as far from there as possible. I ran and ran till I almost fell, then I stopped and leaned on a tree to caught my breathe. There I sat beneath it; I didn't know what to do. I couldn't think straight, I didn't know where to go, I was lost. I could feel the day wearing at me, I was slowly falling asleep. So in an attempt to stop me from falling asleep, I started to walk around. Every now and again I would stop to rest but I didn't want to fall asleep there in the middle of the woods. So I had to keep going. There was dirt all over my body, and I had mud in my hair and on the inside of my shirt. I could feel there were some places on my body that were bleeding from falling. The dirt barely even hurt, when I thought of my fears from the woods. I didn't want to fall asleep and never wake up, or wake up in some cave where I'm about to be eaten by a giant creature. I couldn't fight it anymore; I finally fell to my knees, and when I did there was something that came out from behind a tree. It felt like they were there since I entered the woods. I didn't get to see them very well, then I pasted out without even noticing.

The next morning I woke up beside the lake. I slowly opened my eyes thinking I was in bed. Then when I realized where I was I sat up and held my head. There I looked clear over the lake, then someone sat beside me. It was Draco; he had a cup of water with him. I looked around and I was still covered in dirt and mud. I didn't know what to say, he offered me the water without a word. I looked at it and looked back at him with a face that was slightly disgusted. He didn't look away. I wanted him to say something, anything. I looked at the cup and after a while I took it. He looked at me the whole time with the same expression.

"What was that last night, you had me worried about you." I said while looking at the cup. I then looked at him, his face hadn't moved, blinked, nor breathed. So I kept staring till he answered me, I looked between his eyes. He then nodded slowly and looked at the cup.

"Drink." He said wiping his hands together after standing. The way he said it made me more hesitant to drink it. I stood up after he did, and stepped closer to him.

"Not until you answer me." He was looking the other way, so I stayed there till he turned around. He moved slowly, and seemed more dominate than he normally was. He looked at me for the longest time ever.

"It doesn't concern you, just leave it alone and forget it ever happened." He said while looking straight at me. Then he looked me up and down without looking at my face and said. "Now let's get back, your filthy." Then he started to walk away slowly.

"What's in the water?" I asked just as he took his first step. Asking that question shook me inside, it to me meant that I no longer trusted him. I could feel that it meant the same to him. He then turned slowly with a different look, it looked plan, but if you stared long enough you could see signs of displacement. Were he could feel us pulling apart, I could as well. He put his hand over his mouth and rubbed it. Then he looked at me with a face that was hard to place. His mouth had no emotion, but his eyebrows were pulled up ever so slightly, like he was disappointed.

"You don't have to drink it." He said with a small smile, followed by a light giggle. I didn't know what to do, his mood changed so fast I couldn't see straight. I didn't understand it. I cleared my mind and followed him back to the dorms. When we got to the front door of the school, he moved his hand to make me stop. There we waited till some students left. The whole way there he helped shield me from oncoming traffic. So no one would see what a mess I was. There were a few close calls but we finally made it. It must have been the one time of the day where everyone had a class because no one was in the dorms. I walked up the steps quietly to make sure, I slowly opened the door and peeked around. No one was there so I opened the door fully and walked in. I looked behind me to see Draco walk in and close the door with two hands and peek out the reaming space to see if we were followed. He then looked at me and exhaled. I looked at him with a plan face that could have been taken easily for content anger. He put his hands in his pockets while looking where to sit and sat on the edge of a bed. Then I walked to the shower in the dorm and undressed slowly to make sure no one was going to interrupt. I showered all the dirt and mud away and felt lighter while the soap cleaned me. I walked out with a towel around me and grabbed an extra pair of closes and changed in the stall. I then walked out the main part of the dorm and there Draco was still staring at the same spot.

"Are you going to ever talk to me again? You haven't said anything since last night. I wish you could just trust me." I said to him while I stayed standing up. He said nothing for a while then he looked at me then right back at the floor. I sat down and he looked at me.

"I can't do this anymore, it's becoming too risky." He said while straightening his back and giving me a plain look. I became unstable and wanted to hit something, but then again I wanted to cry till my eyes busted. He looked at me then stood up and waited to see if I had anything to say. I didn't want him to walk away seeing as this could be our last moments. So I had to say something to get him to stay.

"Why? I want this to last, I really do. I can't lose you." I said while rubbing my wet hair with a towel and looking wide eyed at the floor. He stepped a half step back.

"Look, we tried and it's becoming way too risky. I want to stay with you to but…"

"Then let's, we could run away and never look back." I said while stepping closer to him till I was almost touching his chest.

"No, I'm sorry I really am. I'm protecting you, whether you see it like that or not." he then walked away, it was quite but every step he took rang in my head like a gun shot off. I slowly fell to my knees, there my mind started going through all the memories of him and me together. I couldn't bear it; it was like my mind was killing me even more. I grasped my skull with both of my hands and I wanted to scream but nothing came out. I didn't know how to carry on, I couldn't move.

The month past me by, I went on auto pilot, I didn't have a social life. I didn't talk to Amanda anymore. I wasn't sleeping, and the sleep I did get was for short periods of time. I couldn't let him go like this, so I decided what I had to do. That night I slipped away from school. From there I went to the wood were I saw Draco's dad. I really didn't expect to see him there, but I wasn't all there myself. I wasn't thinking clearly. So I decided to try any spell I knew to try and find someone that could help me. The rush of power I was pushing threw me was overwhelming. When I went through any and every spell I knew, I started to collapsed. I fell to the ground, there I lay pasted out. My body just couldn't take it anymore; it shut itself down to sleep.

When I woke up I could smell a fire and I could smell a light sent of scotch. I then started to get my hearing back, I heard the fire. I couldn't move, my body still needed to rest, but my hearing and smell was sharp. Then I heard footsteps, they were coming down a set of steps then to the room I was in. there were two, I wanted to get up and run away, but my body wouldn't move. I pushed my eyes open to see. There was Draco's dad and a house elf. I looked at Draco's dad with confusion. I could then move, I looked at myself and watched as I moved into a sitting position. Then I looked at the house elf who coward behind his cane. I looked at Draco's dad again and looked him up and down.

"How did I get here?" I said, he then waved his cane without looking. The house elf then left, he kept looking back at me while he climbed up the steps. I started to stand up, but to only get knocked down by weakness. He looked at me the whole time like I was an animal that he had hunted, and he was watching me die slowly.

"I found you in the middle of the woods, and thought that you needed help." He said while looking at me. "What, isn't it that want you wanted?"

"I want to ask you something, about Draco." I said while looking at the floor, at the last bit of the sentence. He looked at me with a more attentive face. I then looked into the fire and though of what to say without making myself look weak. So I pushed my teeth together as tight as they would go, before they broke then I breathed in. I started asking how he got into the cult, and did he want to be in the cult in the first place. He told me that because he was in the cult Draco had to follow or shame his family. So I asked if you had to be in a family to be accepted. He said no that as long as you prove yourself worthy that you'll be considered. With every question that I asked his devil like smile grew larger and larger.

"Don't worry about all this information you'll never make it through the initiation. He'll see that you're in it for false love and think nothing of you. He'll kill you before you can ever get the words out." he said while his shadow stretched over the floor. I looked at the floor and thought to myself, that last statement was so accurate, it was beyond belief. Something interrupted my train thought; I looked to the door way when I heard a pair of shoes scuff the floor in a stop. I raced to stand up when Draco appeared in the door way. His face was written with anger, but you could tell he was trying his hardest to contain it. I felt so bad, I couldn't describe it, I wanted to run and get as far from here as possible. But I also wanted to stay here with Draco.

"What are you doing here Vedia." He said while hesitating on my name.

"Nothing I was just…"

"She wants to be with the cult." His dad said before I could take one step. I was looking at the floor, but when he said cult I looked at the edge of the room. I waited a minute and then looked at Draco. I about fell with tears when I saw that his face was full of disappointment, I wanted to get out of there, but Draco made me frozen with a blank mind when he said.

"Okay, go ahead." He said while looking at his dad. I stared at him with disbelief. Then he walked closer to me and grabbed me by my wrist and told his dad that he was going to show me out. I about jerked my hand away from his, but he had a look about him that made me feel safe. So I just followed looking at his face the whole way there. We stood there in the door way and he looked over his shoulder and then back at me with a small smile. He then grasped my face in his hands and kissed me passionately. We didn't want to let go but he had to hurry.

"Please, Vedia, don't do it, for me. I don't want you to get hurt." Then he put me in a car that took me back to school. The whole way there I touched my lips the thinking of our last moments. When those words crossed my mind, I thought to myself, they were the last. The last I'll ever get, I wouldn't be with him when we get back to school. So I looked out the window in thought of what I was going to do to keep him. We got to the school and the driver turned to say 'get out'. I looked at him and then at the door handle. There was a pen on the floor and I grabbed it. I got out of the car and when I closed the door I smiled and waved. I turn and started to walk into the school, I took a few steps. Then I turned and looked to see were the car was. When it was out of sight, I took off running to the lake. I ran as fast as I could while looking everywhere to make sure that no one was looking. I finally got there and I stopped in front of the edge of the lake. I started looking at it while I caught my breath. I then looked at my hand that was holding a pen in it. I thought of what I was about to do, and was considering the consequences. I inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. I got down on my knees and help up my right forearm; I looked at it for a while, then I placed the pen on my arm and looked over the lake. Then I began craving into my arm the tattoo of the cult. I engraved every little detail. There was blood everywhere, and some parts were deeper than the others. I could not make a mistake; I looked away every now and again. The smell was so strong, and not to mention the blood that was running down my arm and over my figures. As I was about to finish the carving, my eyes started to cross. My mind was adrift as I started to faint from the massive amount of blood loss. I got up and ripped part of my jacket and wrapped it tightly. I completely stood up and started to walk back to the school. I almost made it to the bridge when I fainted. There I fell to the ground without feeling a thing as my body slammed against the cold dirt. My vision faded in and out as I watched the sun rise on what was the feeling of my last day.


	7. Chapter 7

I had thoughts run through my mind as I could feel myself slipping away from my body. Some were thoughts of my mom and dad; I would remember memories from when I was little. I remembered when I got my letter for school, and when I meet Draco. Then I went blank, my mind went dark.

I woke up in a bed, with a then blanket over me. I couldn't move at all, no matter how hard I tried. Then I could feel the cold attack my figure tips and creep up my arms. But there was a section that I could feel had something on it. It wasn't cold like the rest of my arm. Then I could smell things, like the cold air. Then I could smell the cleanness of the bed I was on, and the strong smell of medicine. I felt high, like I was lifted off the ground. I then realized I was in the nurse's wing. I just lay there as I hear people walk in, I didn't move at all. I felt dead but I could hear, smell, and fell. There was quite a crowd of people that walked in and they were whispering to one another. Then they stopped at my bed, and someone had hit it slightly too where I could feel the vibrations. They got quite and the nurse started to pull away the bandage from my arm. It didn't hurt to my surprise, I couldn't feel a thing. She told them to look and they all gasped, they started talking again all at once. Then someone suggested making it heal completely, to where it was like as if it never happened. Then the nurse went on to explain how she tried, but the more she did the worse it got. She then showed them, she rubbed a cloth over it, and as she did this the scare started turning into ink. The sore was becoming the tattoo. I then fell back into a sleep.

I woke up to the cold once more. I open my eyes and its night outside of the school. There I woke up quickly, and there is only one torch lit. I feel so full of energy that I stand; the coldness on the floor is shocking. Then I feel uneasy, and I look to the door. There the door shakes and I step back. Then it busts open with a line of men in long black cloaks. I take off running out of the other door. I'll look back every now and again. When I would look back I didn't see a thing, others I would see a black cloud of smoke. Then I would really panic and try to push myself faster. I ran outside. I didn't get far, when the streams of smoke that was following me turned into the men. I stop when I realized I was cornered. They all started pulling there hoods back. The last one, and the one in front of me, was Draco's dad. He looked at me with disgust, and then one started to tell me to follow them. I didn't move, I don't know why I stayed there, but two of the men stood beside me and compelled me to move. I followed them a long way into the woods. There we stopped at the same spot that I saw the fire. The same spot where I first meet Draco's dad. The first of were Draco and I lost each other. If I would have stayed in the dorms and trusted that he would have come back I wouldn't be here. They all spread out and then the fire starts without anyone's help. They tell me that because of what I did that I'm part of the cult. A small part of me feels happy, but the rest feels trapped. They go on to explain that, just because of this accident, I still have to go through a task to prove my worthiness. I look at Draco's dad to find him unraveling a scroll. Then he begins to read the task. Then they explain the rules and guidelines. I look at them all, and nod. They then say a few words and tell me that this does not leave the circle. That if another soul other than a member knows of it that I will fall to my death at the words. I look at the man who relayed this knowledge with wide eyes. Then he waves his wand and I close my eyes in fear of what is fixing to happen. After he says the spell there is silence. It's darker and it's not as cold, then I open my eyes and I'm inside the nurse's office again. I then look around to find myself standing beside my bed. Then I climb in, as soon as I get comfortable they nurse walks in and changes my bandage. As soon as she takes it off the tattoo is gone. She exhales and smiles then instructs me to stay put as she fetches the professors. A group of teachers walk in and marvel at the disappearance of my tattoo. They ask me what happened and I tell them that I can't remember. They ask a few more times in between them congratulating the nurse. Then when they all leave she tells me that I can go back to my dorm. When I get to the door of the common room I'm sure to make it quite as I open and close the door. I look at the door then the floor as I open it and then close the door. When I turn there Draco is asleep on the couch. I stop and walk quietly around him, and then I turn and walk up the steps to my bed. There I think of my task at hand that I have to finish tomorrow.

The next morning I wake up early, I get ready for school and then soon others follow. I walk to the dining hall were I'm supposed to find a 'mole' of some sorts and I have to give him a letter. I look all around but I don't see anyone that is out of the ordinary. Breakfast is over and I continue walking to class. I'm looking all around the hall for someone that fits the description. I only get so far when I'm pulled into any empty class room; I ball up still sore from the trip from last night. I go to look at who it was and then a few words are said and there is a cold gust of wind that blows my hair in every direction. Then the ground sank in a little like dirt, and you could hear bugs and moving water. I look around and we were at a river in a small part of the woods. I turn to look and there is Draco, he is looking at me with anger then he looks at the ground with disappointment. He walks past me to the river and touches the water, then walks back to me. He places his hand on my forearm and says something with his wand on the same spot as my tattoo. After a while it burns and he looks at me the whole time and I look at my arm. In a few seconds my tattoo appears and he lets go with a jerk. I hold my arm as the tattoo fades away. He walks backwards a few steps. He then places him hand over his face and his face turns red as his eyes begin to tear up. He lets go of his chin and walks close to me.

"I told you not to. That no matter what happens to us don't do this." He said while he holds me close. I grit my teeth to prevent the tears from coming out. I step back and look around for a way out of the woods. Then I look at him, "You didn't leave me any choice. I wasn't just going to walk away from the … greatest thing to ever happen to me." Then I walk away and say a return spell. I close my eyes then in second's I'm back at school. I walk slowly over to my bed, and there I sit on the edge of the bed. I hold my face in my hands as I breathe slowly. I change shirts and walk down the dining hall. I open one door and look around. No one appears to be in there, but I look in the back corner and there stands a guy with a black jacket on. I walk half way to him and lay the envelope on the table in front of me. I look at the guy and then walk away. My task was done; I didn't care about being with the cult. I didn't care about anything anymore. I was done with all the emotions and crap. I stepped outside the hall and there I was in the middle of the woods at the fire pit. I stop with brief confusion. The cult stood in front of me and then one stepped forward. He told me that my task was done, but that I couldn't be in the cult until I proved that I no longer had feelings for anyone. Meaning Draco, they told me what I had to do to prove myself.

I return back to the school and there I asked Amanda to get Draco to meet me in the dining hall. As I prep myself, and think to myself. I think of how fed up I am, of all the feelings we were cursed with. That no matter how much you need someone the people around you are the final testament of weather you two came be together. That even if they are willing to risk their very life, they can't make the last call. These thoughts fueled my actions. Being in a tunnel of hatred I couldn't see what I was doing. I had an idea of how to solve everything.

I was standing at the end of the table, and facing the door. Then Draco walked in, he got half way down the table when he asked what I wanted him for.

"What, can I not surprise my boyfriend with a dinner?"

"Well what you said last, I would hardly say that."

"Oh come on, just one last dinner, sit" I told him as he approached the table. We eat without a word for most the afternoon. Then when we finished I stood and pulled out a wine bottle.

"What's that?" he asked while looking at the bottle the whole time.

"It's a bottle of white wine. I what our last dinner to be special." I then pour our wine in to the glasses. He watched me pour the wine. I sat and we raised our glasses.

"Too our last dinner." Then we watched each other drink the wine. I smiled, a confused look came across his face. He looked down as he laid his hand on his stomach. Then he looked at me, I was struggling to keep my body from falling over. I looked at him and whispered 'I love you'.


End file.
